


Even in a desert full of dreams, I still thirst for you

by Nath_happiness, PileOnThePink



Category: Free!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Splash Free, Angst, Arabian AU, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, MakoHaruAuWeek, Nudity, RP AU, makoharu - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-08
Updated: 2015-09-08
Packaged: 2018-04-18 14:27:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4709357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nath_happiness/pseuds/Nath_happiness, https://archiveofourown.org/users/PileOnThePink/pseuds/PileOnThePink
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Six years have passed since Haruka left on a journey to find the ocean...</p><p>-  </p><p>Gazing at the man in earnest, Haruka spoke first, because he realized that Makoto would make no move on the subject. He was too kind for that. </p><p>“Are you mad that I left without saying goodbye?”</p><p>Please check out the other entries for the MakoHaru AU Week on Tumblr as well! So many great submissions!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Even in a desert full of dreams, I still thirst for you

**Author's Note:**

> This was a collaborative, role-play, and fanfic work between Nath_happiness and I. She wrote Haru and I wrote Mako. The ending was written by us both.

 

**Even in a desert full of dreams, I still thirst for you**

**Makoto**

Heat. It was everywhere. The midday sun's rays seemed to bake through to his skin, despite the many loose layers of clothing Makoto wore. His business stall was near the middle of the market place, and therefore left him without the aid of the sheltering shade from nearby buildings.

Normally, the heat didn't bother him too much that he'd contemplate closing early, but the sweat sliding down his neck and back was so insistently distracting and the harsh light was beginning to cause his eyes to sting. Besides, it wasn't like he had any customers browsing at his wares anyway. He sighed, dabbing at his sweaty face with his sash and decided on a short break. He grabbed several cloth tarps, covering each of his products, and after securing them with the tarp and rope, he turned to the friendly owners of the stall next to his and asked them to alert him should a customer come by.

After thanking them, Makoto grabbed his leather water flask and weaved his way through the market in search of some merciful shade. He sidestepped around several people, shouting out apologies when he accidentally bumped into a young mother accompanied by her two children. It really was a busy day in the market and it made it quite a task to try to cross through the square without invading someone else's personal space. Moving around in such narrow places had always been difficult for Makoto. He was so big, with his height and broad shoulders, that he barely noticed he had knocked the person walking in front of him over until a blast of sand came up, spraying against his front.

“I'm so sorry!” he said, hastily bending down to help the stranger back to his feet. He took the longer side of his sash and used it to dust off the loose sand that clung to the stranger's clothes when he fell. His other hand was used to help steady the stranger, who from what Makoto could tell, was a young man around his own age. He couldn’t get a good look at the stranger though, not with the long, blue scarf that was shielding his face.

“Are you alright? Are you hurt anywhere?” he continued to ask, still examining the man's arms and torso for any scrapes and scratches. He gently turned the stranger around, guiding him by his shoulders to see if there was some additional injury that had occurred. "Do you need anything? I can take you to the physician nearby or if you need water..." he trailed off, looking down at the stranger apologetically.

**Haruka**

It had been so long since the last time Haruka felt this bad. He wandered alone in the desert for many years, facing the merciless sand, looking for something out of the ordinary, looking for something to prove his worth. Despite the fact that the city he found himself in now was burning hot, his body was shivering from head to toe, and a cold sweat stuck to his oily skin.

He remembered the bright colors and the Arabian patterns of the clothes displayed in the crowded market, he could see the stone towers of the palace shading a large part of the town. Bitter memories accompanied him, following along with every one of his footsteps, guiding him, and every noise, every sight, brought him back to a time when he was still seventeen years old, naïve and confused.

Home.

He was finally home, but it surely didn’t feel that way. All of a sudden, the weight of the expectations laid out on his shoulders made him feel weak. He wanted to hide again, turn around and run away, but… there was a matter he needed to settle once and for all.

And it had to be now.

With his trembling fingers, Haruka pushed the bangs away from his forehead, which was soaking wet. He stopped in the middle of the street, and closed his eyes. There was no way he could walk anymore, not without some water. After all, it had been days since the last time he tasted the pristine liquid on his lips. So long, so long…

Then, a heavy, muscular body crashed into him, challenging his center of gravity and pushing Haruka easily to the ground. Even though he couldn’t think straight anymore, the sweet voice that reached his ears made his breath hitch and he stared at the handsome man in front of him with huge blue eyes.

The man was concerned over him, helping Haruka around and asking so many useless questions. Those hands, those eyes, a combination Haruka thought about every hour of the day. However, the way the stranger was behaving left Haruka wondering if the man did forget about him, and the thought left a bad taste in his mouth.

Once the sapphire eyes caught a glimpse of the emerald orbs, Haruka unconsciously reached over and grabbed the man’s shirt with clenched fists, in a tight grip.

“Makoto,” he whispered the name like a prayer, then his demanding side took over and his voice commanded, louder, “Water.”

 

**Makoto**

Makoto continued to fuss over the stranger, smoothing his large hands over the other's clothes and frame, worriedly. He was so preoccupied that he didn't register right away that someone was addressing him by his name. But when he finally caught it, he paused, facing the other and Makoto's eyes narrowed as he tried to reason how this person must have known him. He didn't remember seeing this man in the market before, nor did he think the stranger was an acquaintance of his parents...

But before he could ponder on the matter further, a slim hand shot out, fisting into his shirt and pulled him closer, and this time Makoto caught the hardened voice of the stranger say, "Water."

From their close proximity, Makoto could see the other's piercing, blue eyes peering out of the long, blue scarf and he startled, recognizing them immediately. There was only one person he'd ever known to possess such eyes like that and even though it had been almost six years since his friend had left the city, Makoto could never forget them. They haunted his dreams sometimes, even going so far as to invade his thoughts during the daytime. And this surely must have been a dream too, or a mirage from spending all day out in the severe heat. Because there was no way that Makoto was this lucky, not so lucky that he could be reunited with Haruka again.

"Haru," he said the name slowly, carefully, as if he was afraid that the other boy would vanish in an instant. "Is it-Is that really you?" he asked, voice heavy with disbelief and his hands shook as he carefully removed the scarf from around the other's face. His heart nearly stopped in his chest when the last of it fell away, revealing Haruka, who now stared boldly back at him.

It _was_ Haruka. Overheated and weather-worn, but Haruka all the same, and Makoto felt the relieved tears rush to his eyes, prickling at the corners, threatening to fall at any moment. He wanted nothing more than to drag Haruka into his arms, hug him close and thank the deities for bringing his friend back to him safe and sound, but as he looked closer, he took in Haruka's weary state and he straightened, remembering his priorities.

"How thoughtless of me, I'm so sorry!" Makoto immediately apologized, reaching out to steady Haruka with one hand. He maneuvered them a few steps away, so that they weren't in the direct pathway of the other townspeople, and quickly raised his water flask to the other boy's parched lips.

"Here, drink," he urged. "When you have a chance to regain your strength a little, we'll get you into the shade," he promised, already undoing the sash from around his shoulders and dragging it through Haruka's sweaty bangs. Once he soaked up most of the sweat, he continued to pat it gently along the other man’s temple.

 

**Haruka**

After savoring the taste of the sacred, precious water, Haruka took in Makoto’s clean features and well-cut merchant clothes. _So he started helping his family with the business, huh?_ That had been his dream since he was a child, after all. Haruka shouldn’t be surprised.

Then he looked down at himself, all dirty with loads of sand, dust and sweat. There were holes, weird gaps in the fabric of his shirt and shoes, the color of the scarf long gone from light blue to a dark shade of brown. His black hair had been cut by his own severe hands, and Haruka knew he messed up badly with some locks of it.

Pitying himself was not something Haruka did very often, and he made sure to put his sad thoughts away. Somewhere deep in his mind, he wondered why in the world Makoto didn’t touch him more freely. Could it be that Haruka, the heir to the throne was expecting a hug from his best friend… or a little more fussing coming from him?

_What was I expecting, really?_

But the gently wiping at his forehead felt good… extremely good… so damn good that Haruka’s brain shut down for a moment, allowing him to act on impulse. Grabbing Makoto’s large hands, he dragged the man in the direction of his house. Not the fancy palace and its rooms made of gold, not his family’s residence with its huge towers and dark chambers, but the small room he rented from Mr. Sasabe, the place where he could be himself, the home he loved the most.

The secret he kept from everyone else, except Makoto.

 

**Makoto**

Makoto continued to attend to Haruka, watching anxiously as the other boy swallowed most of the satchel's contents and prepared to intervene if Haruka were to chock.

His hands fluttered up worriedly, a habit that he'd developed years ago when his parents entrusted him to help with raising his younger siblings. He admitted to being overly protective of them when they were young and he still had moments when he'd have that urge to help them, either by finishing their chores for them or sneaking them extra meat from his own plate while their parents weren't looking. His protective, nurturing side didn't just come out around his family, however. He acted similarly around his friends too, extending the same care and worry when they decided to do something foolish. Sometimes the reason for his actions were simply just to comfort and support them when his friends were going through a rough time, which happened more often than not.

Makoto wasn't like the rest of his friends. He wasn't born in a noble family like Rin and Haruka, nor were his parents necessary aids to the palace like Nagisa's and Rei's were. He was just a regular boy, there was nothing special about him. He was only lucky enough to become Haruka's friend through extraordinary circumstances. If his father hadn't handled a personal errand for Haruka's family, they might not have ever met, let alone become close friends. And while Makoto did tend to change the nature of their roles as they got older, by subconsciously fussing over Haruka's antics of diving into the garden fountains or bribing him, so that his friend wouldn’t get in trouble for ditching during royal functions, Haruka had also taken care of Makoto too.

Makoto had been allowed to attend the same tutoring lessons as Haruka along with the other young, royal children. It was obvious by Makoto's dress and mannerisms that he was different, that he didn't belong, but when the other children made snide remarks, it was Haruka who always defended him and stood up for him. Haruka who always dried his tears and comforted him when the insults were too harsh. Haruka who always softly insisted, "Makoto is fine the way he is." It made Makoto want to repay all that kindness somehow, and when they got older, Makoto then found the chance. He tried to be helpful to Haruka in any way he could, even though he knew in the back of his mind that he couldn't remain by Haruka's side forever. As a descendant of the royal line and a sultan-appointed potential heir, Haruka may one day have to take on his responsibilities and travel down a road that Makoto, with his humble and modest upbringing, could not follow.

That was the most painful thing Makoto realized when Haruka went away. That things between them would be different now and no matter how close they had been as children, it would all result in the same thing.

Knowing this, Makoto felt both guilt and shame as he resisted the urge to move closer. He was already breaking social protocol by touching Haruka's face directly, but at least the other boy's appearance gave Makoto an excuse this time. He slowed his ministrations sadly, prolonging the moment, as he realized he wouldn't have another excuse to touch Haruka so intimately again.

 _You knew this was coming,_ he scolded himself. _Haru doesn't need you to take care of him anymore. He's been without you for years and now that he's returned, he'll be supported by the other members of the noble family and the palace’s council advisors._

But suddenly, his hand was stopped, snatched up by a surprisingly stronger one and Makoto felt himself being tugged fiercely away from the pathway, being turned toward another direction altogether. Makoto blinked, stunned when he realized that Haruka was leading him away from the marketplace, which was surrounded by a few of the prominent council members’ homes, in favor of moving toward the humbler part  of the city.

"Haru," Makoto called out, his eyebrows knitting together as he tried to think of why Haruka could be leading him there instead of back towards the palace gates, where his family’s estate lay waiting for him just over the walls. He tried to jerk his hand back, to slow the other down a little, but Haruka kept pulling, his hand almost vice-like on Makoto's own. "Why are you taking us this way? Shouldn't you be returning to your family? They must be worried, and the Vizier will want to hear an account of your journey." Surely that was the most important thing right now, returning Haruka to his family and assuring them that their son was safe. Followed by the reporting of Haruka’s return to the appropriate city officials, so that Haruka could rightfully claim his new royal status.

 

**Haruka**

As Haruka dragged his best friend through the lower part of town, he couldn’t help the tiny, sad smile that crossed his face. No matter what happens, or how much time passes, Makoto doesn’t change. His protests and complaints were flashing evidence of that fact. Always kind, always worried about normalcy and family state issues, diplomacy and politics, boring matters that Haruka wished he was able to throw it all to the wind.

More than once, he wondered if had been born in the wrong body, and that Makoto should be the heir to the throne instead.

The streets became narrowed, and turned into dark alleys with not a soul hanging around, until they finally reached the building they were looking for. As they got closer, Haruka’s footsteps became hurried and they were running, opening his door (which to Haruka’s surprise was locked) and getting inside.

From the corner of his eyes, the blue-eyed man noticed that Makoto was out of breath, leaning against the door, hands on his chest. Despite his many years of absence, the room is clean, the bed sheets are plain white and he didn’t see a single bit of dust anywhere.

_Makoto’s doing, for sure._

He seemed so sure of himself on the way here. Now, however, Haruka’s mind was unexpectedly blank. Not a single thought, nor a single word to say to Makoto. So he walked past the other man, taking off his slippers, cloak, top, and scarf in the process, and jumped into the empty basin. It felt strange to have memories of floating freely on the water when there is just earth, sand and misery in this town.

At last, he stared right at his trembling friend, glaring up at his ridiculous expression.

“Makoto. Don’t just stand there.” As he spoke, the blue shade in his eyes turned softer, calmer, like a fresh breeze before the sudden storm. “How have you been?”

 

**Makoto**

Collecting himself, Makoto followed Haruka's prompting and let his hand fall away from his chest. He stepped closer, slowly removing the turban from his head and ran a hand through his sweat-drenched hair. When he reached Haruka's side, he knelt beside the large basin and leaned forward so that his folded arms rested on top of his knees.

He regarded the other for a moment with his usual patient gaze, but after seeing Haruka do something so ridiculous, so predictable, Makoto couldn't help but give in to the smile that persistently tugged at his lips. Pure affection radiated from him, and it was all he could do to keep himself from acting on it by reaching out and touching the other's face.

Instead, he propped his chin on his hand and tilted his head in order to restrain his joyful smile. "I know you are probably already aware of this, but while you were away, I took over my family's business," he informed the other softly. "My parents are retired now and the twins are attending private lessons, but they help me come by here sometimes to clean out your old room. I made sure to keep it as you left it. I didn't know if you would still want to use it when you returned, but I'm glad I was able to be of some use to you while both you and Rin were away."

 

**Haruka**

Huh. From the way Makoto was talking, it seemed as if Rin hadn’t come back yet. Haruka wondered for a second if his friend had found what he was looking for: a way to finally beat Haruka and take his throne away from him. Not that he cared much about ruling others. To Haruka, the most important thing was for him to be free, to think and feel for himself.

Haruka knew that the moment the crown touched his dark hair, invisible chains would lock onto his wrists, forever. But a challenge was a challenge, and he would like to watch Rin lose this time.

It was hot. In his eagerness to get to the basin he had forgotten to open the windows and let fresh air enter the room. He half expected Makoto to complete this task, like in the past, but the man before his eyes had chosen to sit on the floor instead. It was subtle, a barely there change, but an alteration nevertheless.

Gazing at the man in earnest, Haruka spoke first, because he realized that Makoto would make no move on the subject. He was too kind for that. “Are you mad that I left without saying goodbye?”

 

**Makoto**

Makoto's eyes widened and his mouth fell slack at the blunt question. He quickly shook his head, his voice coming out in a rush as he leaned in closer. "No," he denied, his expression troubled as he planted both hands on the basin. "No, I was never angry about that," he said, and this time his voice came out softer, more resigned. "I knew that you had to go on your journey soon, but it was still a surprise when I heard that you left."

He remembered Haruka's increased agitation following his eighteenth birthday, just a few weeks before he had abruptly left on his pilgrimage. How his childhood friend's mood had soured and his thoughts always seemed far away. It became harder to pick up on Haruka's feelings and thoughts, like the other was slowly withdrawing into himself and blocking everyone else out. Unable to come up with a solution, Makoto was left with no way to comfort his friend other than to offer his silent, constant presence as support. Even now, years after, Makoto didn't know what to do or say to make the other feel more at ease.

It showed just how much the both of them had changed.

"The only thing I could think about afterward was how hard it must have been for you. For you not to say anything and to go off on your own like that..." He shook his head and offered Haruka a sad, small smile. "I'm sorry that I didn't realize how alone and overwhelmed you must have felt."

**Haruka**

To talk about the past and its intricate chain of misunderstandings was harder than he thought. Haruka could feel his head trembling from old wounds and he took a deep breath not to say anything foolish.

After that, he gazed at Makoto for a long time, replaying the boy’s speech, full of heart, in his mind.

His best friend had grown up. Really grown up. His shoulders were wider, his face more masculine and he was even taller than he used to be, maybe more than a foot taller than Haruka.

Without warning, Haruka stood up and walked past Makoto, opening the large windows of the room. The heavy wood was hard to handle, but after a moment the breeze entered the apartment and illuminated the small bits of dust that hung in the air. It felt better like this. Outside the windows, just the back of old houses appeared, which meant that no one could spy on their activities. The thought sent a delighted shiver down Haruka’s spine.

Haruka turned his attention back to Makoto. “I know. I am sorry.” There was more he wanted to say, but couldn’t find the words. It was awkward with him. It was lonely without him. “The ocean… I found it. It exists and it’s beautiful, just like my grandmother said.”

 

**Makoto**

"The ocean," Makoto breathed, voice quiet with amazement. He was so surprised that he could hardly believe it, remembering the outlandish nighttime stories Haruka's grandmother used to tell them. It all seemed too amazing to be real, but Makoto knew Haruka had always hoped to see it one day. _What did it look like_ , Makoto wondered. _Was it just as Haruka's grandmother had described? Was it comparable to the large desert that Haruka had to cross in order to find it?_

Remembering himself, Makoto quickly got to his feet. "That's incredible, Haru," he said, his chest swelling with both admiration and pride as he looked back at his best friend. "That was the task you accepted from the Vizier, right?" he asked, unable to keep the grin off his face and too overcome with excitement to give Haruka a chance to answer. "You've won the challenge then! Rin still hasn't returned from his journey to _Down Under_ so if you can present proof, then the throne is rightfully yours."

**Haruka**

Haruka’s heart was a pool of serpentine doubts, and his gaze reflected a glimpse of his insecurities. Even so, he couldn’t help that the corner of his mouth turned upright, not when Makoto looked so excited, so bewildered with the idea of the ocean, what it meant for the both of them. Just for them.

For a moment, he traveled back to his childhood, to the long, sweet nights when they would lay side by side and talk about the oncoming days, hoping to find the clear blue water together, with minds filled with bedtime stories and shared dreams.

The idea that Haruka would become the sultan was always there with them, a never questioned truth hanging over their younger heads. Like a promise, until it turned into a curse.

The heir knew that Makoto’s pure heart still viewed it as something extremely good, as an achievement to be proud of. He had so much faith in Haruka’s skills. But, seriously, if anyone (less blind than Makoto, of course) believed that Haruka could be a good ruler, then they didn’t have any idea of what a good leader truly was made of.

On top of that… there was a more important matter to consider: _descendants_.

Haruka suddenly remembered the flow of Makoto’s hair against his neck, and the warmth of his skin close to his own, the smell of his presence on his sheets in the early morning.

He let out a shaky breath all of a sudden, startling Makoto. But really, there was no way in hell he could leave a child behind. Not in this lifetime. Not when Makoto lived.

When it became clear that the Matsuoka House would fight for the throne against the Nanase’s all of those years ago, Haruka saw a way out without shaming his family’s pride.

 

_“The North Ocean and the Vulcans in the South: the main images of each of our houses, a past of water and fire ingrained into our blood. It’s has been decided by the council, and our word is the law. Nanase-kun and Matsuoka-kun, you will find the place where your lineage comes from. The first of you to return with a gift to prove that you reached your destination will become the next sultan,” the current ruler, Haruka’s father, had said. His decree prompting a cheer from the gathered crowd of spectators and both Rin and Haruka stared at each other, competitively, from across the room._

 

And so Haruka took the challenge seriously, because he knew how eager Rin was about the throne, but if his rival wasn’t back yet…

The raven-haired man pushed off from the window, and walked over to his discarded clothes, searching for a vintage, decorative box. Upon finding it, he handed it to Makoto and instructed him with, “Open it.”

 

**Makoto**

Makoto recognized the box the moment he took it carefully into his hands. It was small and oval shaped, made from the finest gold the royal treasury had to offer. Several sapphires and emeralds dotted the edges, but the most noticeable of all the adornments was the large ruby that sat proudly on top, glinting in the faint light.

Makoto's eyes softened as he gazed at the box tenderly for a moment. He remembered the late nights when he had been allowed to stay at the palace as a child, how he would hear some strange noise and be unable to fall back asleep. His tossing and turning, along with his soft sniffles, would always wake up Haruka as well. However, no matter the inconvenience it must have caused the young royal, Haruka  never made fun of him. He'd only slip from the bed, take Makoto's hand, and guide them both to his grandmother's room. Haruka's grandmother would patiently let them in, tell them the calming stories of the ocean. Sometimes, if they were having a harder time falling asleep, she would let the boys explore the contents of her armoire. Where this jewelry box in particular resided, stowed away safely in one of the drawers. It had been a wedding present to her from Haruka’s grandfather. Makoto expected that one day, it would be passed on to Haruka, who would give it to his own bride too.

"You've kept your grandmother's jewelry box all this time?" Makoto wondered, smiling softly to distract himself from the slight nervousness stirring in his gut at what Haruka could have brought back with him. He took a moment and glanced up to catch Haruka's gaze before he delicately released the front clasp of the box and pulled it open.

Inside the box, in the middle of the heavy, velvet interior, was a small shell. Makoto wasn't sure what kind it was, as Haruka's grandmother had only drawn and described a few examples in her stories of the ocean. But it was unmistakably a shell, with it's white and pink freckled body. It had a prominent, cone-shaped head, and the body was long, even as it spiraled with a curl at the tail, reminding Makoto of a ram's horn.

Makoto continued to stare at it, amazed, before he slowly looked back to Haruka again. "Haru...you really..." his voice trailed off and he sniffed loudly to keep his emotions from getting the best of him. It was amazing. Haruka had really found it. He'd found the ocean, and had made their childhood dream come true.

 

**Haruka**

The air was thick in the room, like a palpable being, struggling to make its way between the two men. Haruka counted down a few heartbeats, admiring the fond gaze in the emerald eyes for a moment, heart clogged in his throat.

“Yeah... I did,” he spoke absent mindedly with a slight shake in his voice, and then moved to take a hold of the large hands and the box in his own fingers. “Makoto.”

He was shorter than his friend, so he entered his personal space and looked up at him with feverish eyes. His skin still glinted with all the sweat and dirt from the long trip. Compared to Makoto’s fresher skin and clean garments, Haruka felt like a homeless person, but he tried not to think too much about that. The fact that Makoto had seen Haruka in more embarrassing situations before revealed a lot about the nature of their relationship, and it calmed his mind down a bit.

“Did you mean what you said the last time I saw you?” And then, “Do you still think that way?”

 

**Makoto**

Haruka's hands were warm and comforting, pressed against his own. Such a familiar and intimate touch, that combined with Haruka's closeness and those shinning blue eyes, Makoto felt he could easily lose himself in that moment. However, the mention of that night caused Makoto's shoulders to stiffen and his facial expression changed to reflect his anxiety.

_Following the day the sultan had assigned both Rin and Haruka their tasks for the challenge, Makoto and Haruka had met during the night, neither one wanting to discuss the unfair roles and expectations they both found themselves in. But still, it had to be done. Makoto needed to address it with Haruka, regardless of the way the other boy rebuffed the subject of the throne or going away on his journey. And while a part of Makoto wanted to be selfish, to keep Haruka by his side forever, he couldn't bring himself to say his feelings aloud. They were adults now. Childhood dreams and promises of love wouldn't last when compared to the very real expectations that their families had placed on them. Haruka had been born and raised to be sultan, and Makoto would utilize the skills his father taught him and inherit the family business. That’s how things were supposed to be._

_Makoto needed to be sure that Haruka understood this. That he understood his position and how important and valuable he was, not just to Makoto, but to the entire kingdom. Makoto couldn't keep selfishly holding Haruka back, and if he wanted the other boy to finally understand and follow his destiny and become sultan, then Makoto had to let him go._

_And so Makoto did. That night, when both he and Haruka had retreated to the private, rented room on the other side of town, he carried out his decision. He regretfully withdrew from the willowy arms wrapped around his waist and moved his head so that the kiss Haruka intended to press against his lips met his cheek instead. Haruka had pulled away, looking up at him with wide, questioning eyes and it was then that Makoto bluntly said the words that he knew would change the relationship between them forever…_

_"Haru, we're no longer children anymore. It's time we accepted that,” he went on, voice soft and weary as he slid a hand through the raven hair. “I need to think about my own future and you, you shouldn't let your talent and position go to waste. You should treat this challenge seriously, get married, and become sultan."As he spoke the last words, he withdrew his hands, away from Haruka’s reach._

 

It had been their first and only fight, a memory Makoto did not want to relive, because it made his heart ache so badly. But Haruka had finally come back, after so many years, and though it was painful, he deserved to have an answer. He deserved to hear the truth and the entirety of Makoto's feelings.

Makoto took a breath, his mouth forming a firm line as he looked to the side. "I don't want you to marry," he answered, knowing he didn't have the right to say such a brazen thing now. He had been the one to push Haruka away after all, but the thought of Haruka taking a bride was unbearable.

"I don't want you to marry," he said again, "But I know that you'll make a great sultan. You're not easily swayed by power or wealth and you genuinely care for the kingdom, regardless of how much you protested about it in the past. So Haru, if you accept the throne and marry, I'll do my best and support you. I'm just a merchant now but I'll still uphold my duties as a loyal subject."

 

**Haruka**

For a long moment, Haruka did nothing but stare at the other man. Blame it on the words that still hovered in the air, blame it on the slight frown marring Makoto’s face, blame it on the way his friend had clenched his fist unconsciously. Maybe everything about that moment would be carved into Haruka’s memory for the rest of his days.

It felt like a lifetime since the last time he heard Makoto’s true feelings. And finally, he understood.

Part of him wanted to smile, burst into this calm, precious feeling, while his other side desired to tease Makoto about the variety of marriage proposals he had received over the years. The merchant’s son would be surprised, his voice would stutter and his face would turn into such a nice shade of red.

All of that would have to happen later though, perhaps while tangled on a bed with soft sheets. Right now, the mood asked for something else. The hard lines of Makoto’s shoulders were rigid like a brick wall, and Haruka could make out the insecurities and uneasiness written all over it.

Makoto was, in fact, terrified.

Slowly, like a caress, Haruka approached his friend and leaned his forehead on the other’s muscular chest, closing his eyes, their hands and the box trapped between the two bodies. “Then I won’t become the sultan,” he spoke the words stubbornly, and then softly, “I can’t marry anyone but you.”

He didn’t mean to, but his voice turned raw and harsh with how much he had been holding back. So much time wasted, so many things to say, so many nights alone, gazing at the empty sky, wishing to be by Makoto’s side. He moved his face slightly, and murmured into the curve of Makoto’s neck.

“It’s meaningless without you.”

 

**Makoto**

Makoto never expected for his own words to be turned back onto him, nor did he expect them to ever be his undoing. But as he stood pressed against Haruka, he realized he should have noticed it sooner. Haruka had always been the only one who could disarm him completely, the one who always saw right through him in a way that no one else could. Shaking his head ruefully, Makoto wanted to laugh at himself for being such an idiot, for spending all this time worrying over his silly fears, but when he opened his mouth to let out the sound, the only thing that escaped was a quiet sob.

It caused his breath to hitch, his mouth hanging open in surprise as more sobs came and suddenly, tears were streaming uninhibited down his face. He tried to suppress them at first by pressing his face futilely against Haruka's bare shoulder. However, Makoto soon found that not only did guilt and regret come with the tears, but so did _relief_ , flooding through him even as his whole upper body shook from his crying.

How much simpler would the last six years have been for them if Makoto had just been honest from the start? He didn’t want to have to go through the heartache of learning this lesson again.

When his crying finally ebbed, Makoto nuzzled his face further against Haruka's bare shoulder, whispering  a soft apology for losing control for a moment. From his position, he could feel Haruka's light breathing against the side of his neck, stirring his hair and heating up his skin. Comforting and reaffirming in a way that could never be compared with just a simple exchange of words. Just being beside Haruka was comforting to Makoto, even if they weren't always physically touching.

The love and adoration he felt for Haruka had always been so strong and overpowering that just simply brushing their shoulders together or holding hands would leave them both longing and restless. And now, with them like this, so close that he could feel the heat from Haruka’s body seeping into his own, Makoto feared he might burn.

They had never been very demonstrative regarding their mutual feelings, nor were they the kind to make outright declarations of love. Not because they didn't want to, but because doing so was always so much, too much. Acting on their physical urges only served to amplify their feelings even more. If Makoto were to compare them to anything, he would liken their hearts to a pair of firestones, baking softly in the hearth, and when they were struck together they would spark, igniting each of them all the way down to their bones.

Makoto slowly turned his head, ghosting his lips against Haruka's neck in the process and he paused when he spotted a flash of color slowly and steadily blooming across the other man's face. It nearly winded him, seeing Haruka look so lovely and when he felt a surge of heat run hot and deep through his heart, Makoto supposed that it wouldn't be so bad if he were to end up burning after all. Not if it meant that Haruka would burn pleasantly with him.

He carefully untangled one of his hands from between them, mindful not to jostle the jewelry box, and curled his arm around Haruka's waist, pulling the other man gently forward until their hips were flushed against each other.

"Haru, I can't be without you anymore," Makoto murmured softly, raising his head to press his lips more firmly against Haruka's neck.

**Haruka**

The touch felt good. Makoto felt good. Real and tender, soft and human, the best person in the world even when he cried like this… especially because he cried like this.

Haruka let himself enjoy the hardness of his lover’s body, running slow fingers over his chest, following the thunderous movements of the other’s heartbeat. Makoto’s scent hadn’t changed.

After a comfortable silence, he gathered the courage to speak his mind.

“Makoto,” said Haruka, blue eyes locked on green ones. “The shell is yours. I brought it for you. I thought it would be harder to get you back.” The corner of his lips turned up a little bit, and he couldn’t help adjusting himself and sliding his hips over Makoto’s carefully, shivering slightly at the hot sensation. “Everything will be okay. You know that, right? Rin will be a great sultan since he is responsible and watchful of others just like you. My family will have to understand and learn to deal with it eventually. I don’t care.” Then he moved his hips again, nails digging into Makoto’s firm biceps.

His companion was silently listening to Haruka’s words, barely breathing, because even after all this time he still knew how to appreciate the few times that Haruka opened his heart. Those moments when the words would flow naturally from the usually stoic boy were rare and could be counted on one hand.

“I get that we were young, but I don’t want to fight with you again. I get that you work at your family business now, have grown old and maybe away from me. If you want to keep living like that, I can get used to it. I can find something different to do with my skills. But – if you want, we can make our dream come through. We can go back to the ocean. Together.”

And when he whispered those last words, his eyes sparkled bright, like shooting stars.

**Makoto**

His hand tightened unconsciously around the box as he continued to stare at Haruka in awe, his whole body trembling upon hearing those words. _Together._ Haruka wanted them to be together too.

“I’ll tell my parents,” he said immediately, eyelashes fluttering as he rubbed at his forehead in deep thought. He was already making a list of things they’d need to do before they’d left the city for good. He’d have to bring Haruka with him to tell his family of their decision and he felt a brief twinge of anxiousness knowing they’d have to also explain to Haruka’s own. It would be a simple matter to just leave together, abruptly in the middle of the night; and while the notion was exciting and would serve to let them be together sooner, they couldn’t just run away from settling their responsibilities first.

“My father doesn’t know that I’m aware, but I’ve seen him training Ren about the business when he thought I wasn’t around. I think both he and my mother knew that when you returned and if we were reunited again, if I were ever given the chance, I would leave with you,” he confessed with a smile and raised a hand up to trace over Haruka’s face, slowly trailing his calloused fingers along a prominent cheekbone and over a small, delicate chin. “Like I said before, I can’t be without you again. Not a day went by that I didn’t think about you, wondering how you were and if you were safe. Now that I’m older, I realize that my home and my heart are only where you are.”

When his hand fell away from Haruka’s face, he moved it so that it went behind the other man’s slim shoulders and into that dark, tousled hair. “You say you could get used to it, staying in this city --but I don’t want you to do that for me. You’d be silently suffering through it all, dreaming of the ocean.” He used the hand buried in Haruka’s hair to bring their faces closer, and he tilted his head down so that their foreheads were touching. “I want to go with you. I want to see all that you’ve seen in your travels and I want you to show me the ocean, just like in our dreams. Is that okay?” he asked, flushing a little after realizing all the bold things he had just said.

Haruka’s own face had flushed as well, his eyes shining brightly and he abruptly bit his trembling lips and ducked his head, prompting Makoto to smile when he caught the other’s soft voice replying with, “Yeah.”

“Thank you,” Makoto said, nuzzling the sides of their faces together affectionately before drawing back. He turned, placing the jewelry box down on the side table near the basin and the bed as he caught the faint light coming through the windows. They couldn’t see much from how close the windows were to the other surrounding buildings, but he could tell that it was quickly approaching evening. The market would be closing soon and his father and Ren would come as they did every day to help him pack up and accompany him home. He felt confident that the friendly merchants who watched over his shop were still there, and would tell his father and Ren that he had left. They might be surprised, but he figured he could leave the packing up to them just this once. After all, reunions like this required proper celebrating and he could fill them in on all that he and Haruka talked about later on.

He glanced back at Haruka, his green eyes slowly taking in the other man’s naked shoulders and chest, appreciating the more muscular changes that had taken place over the years. He reached over wordlessly and hooked both his thumbs into waistline of Haruka’s trousers, and backed up toward the basin, tugging the shorter man along with him.

Haruka flashed him a confused look, but followed along and Makoto couldn’t help but grin as he gently ushered Haruka to sit on the stool beside the basin. When Haruka was settled, Makoto knelt before him, gently taking hold of one of Haruka’s legs and pushing the fabric of his clothing up until it was above his knee.

Makoto briefly removed the sash around his shoulders, dropping it to the side so he could have more mobility, and then his hands were back on Haruka again, gliding over that tanned skin, coaxing and massaging the weary muscles. He could feel Haruka relax a little beneath his touch and when he glanced up, he could see those blue eyes trained on him, hot and piercing, taking in his every move. He smiled, aware that the room had somehow gotten warmer, and maintained eye contact as he pressed a slow kiss to Haruka’s knee before turning to give the same treatment to Haruka’s other leg.

“You’ve had a long journey,” he said, already pushing the clothing up and his fingers may or may not have deliberately skimmed along the inside of Haruka’s thigh, almost touching his groin. “Allow me to be the one to give you a proper welcome back,” he added, not missing the answering flare of arousal that flashed brightly in Haruka’s eyes. “Come, let’s get you into the bath.”

Haruka allowed himself to be helped to stand by Makoto, their arms brushing slightly as he moved to step up into the basin. Haruka lowered his hands to the waistband of his clothing, and as he pulled the trousers down, he looked directly at Makoto, their eyes catching. He smiled, warm and inviting, before stepping out of the trousers and dropping them in a pile on the floor. He maintained their joint gaze, unashamedly standing naked before Makoto, but when Haruka spoke, he said something that was too low for the brunet to catch.

“What was that?” Makoto asked, his brows furrowing as he lowered his head to hear better. He could feel the puffs of air brushing against his face as Haruka spoke again, reiterating what he had said before, but for some reason, Makoto still couldn’t understand. It didn’t make sense. He knew that Haruka was speaking to him, he could see the other man’s mouth moving but it was like the sound of Haruka’s voice was far away. Distorted enough to remind Makoto of the times he had ducked his head under the water in the palace baths and he could only faintly catch what Haruka had spoken to him.

But that was ridiculous. They weren’t under water and Haruka was right beside him so why…

“Haru, I-I’m sorry but I don’t-”

A spike of dizziness hit him and Makoto instinctively drew back, grabbing at his head as his vision blurred. He could vaguely make out Haruka’s figure leaning toward him over the edge of the basin, his arms reaching wildly out for him and his expression distraught. But Makoto still couldn’t decipher what his lover was saying to him, all he could feel was the present pain in the back of his head increasing as a strange, buzzing sound blared inside his ears.

The room around him began to dim, his eyelids drooping heavily as it became too much. He slunk down to the ground, exhausted, the last of his energy being sapped out of him. When he turned his face up toward the ceiling of the room, he noticed that it didn’t look like it did before and shifting his gaze to the side only further confirmed that his surroundings had changed entirely. Haruka was no longer with him, wherever he was now, and Makoto panicked, turning to look at a peculiar light glowing right beside him.

He tried to sit up, but when he did the buzzing sound only grew, becoming completely unbearable. He felt his head slump forward onto his chest and his eyes were forcefully shut, no matter how much he tried to resist. As he let go, he felt regret for not hearing the last words Haruka spoke to him.

 

***    *   *   *   ***

Makoto woke with a jerk, body sweating as his eyes darted dazedly around the hotel bedroom, trying to make sense of where he was. Taking a breath, he peered through the darkness and noticed a faint light coming from his bedside table accompanied by another loud notification chime. He had just received a text message from someone.

 _But who could it be so early?_ he wondered, squinting tiredly at it as he reached over to check.

His mind was still hazy but he was vaguely aware of the discomfort in his boxers when he turned over in his bed, accidently brushing his erection against the sheets. He let out a soft hiss, putting more pressure against it as he grabbed the phone. His thoughts still lingered on the events of the strange dream as he slid his thumb over the screen, unlocking it and quickly scrolling through his notifications.

It was a little difficult to make out who the sender was without having his contacts on, but after rubbing at his eyes and blinking repeatedly for a few seconds, he was finally able to decipher Rin’s name.

Before reading the message, Makoto took a moment and closed his eyes, trying to gather up his courage. He wasn’t normally this hesitant, but if Rin was contacting him now, than it had to be about Haru.

 _Haruka._ His best friend. He would never admit it out loud, but Haru was the one person he cared for more than life itself. Haru had this energy, this vibrating quality about him that showed how much greatness the boy could achieve, if only he chose to lift up his hands and grasp it. It didn’t even have to be about swimming, just something that he loved. Makoto would support Haru’s decision no matter what it was, so long as it would make Haru happy.

With the passing of time, the reality that Haru and Makoto’s paths were diverging only increased, resulting in the ruthless words spoken under dazzling fireworks, a blurred background for the first fight they ever had.

And now Haru was in Australia, with the ocean, Rin and the opportunity to find his dream. So far away from the small town of Iwatobi. Somehow, the memories of salted skin, raven hair, infinite sand and clear blue water still filled his sleepy mind, and he wondered for a second what the dream had meant. If dreaming about your _naked_ best friend and waking up with a boner had any meaning at all.

Opening his eyes, Makoto glanced at the empty bed by his side. On a normal day, before the start of a competition, Haru would be lying there, giving him a quiet sense of comfort, like home. But now, Haru was in a different country, more than four thousand miles away from Japan, trying to sort out his feelings, without him. With a sigh, Makoto looked down at his cell phone and clicked on the message icon.

 

_Yo, Makoto. It’s all fine. We're back in two days. Let’s go out! Your treat ;)_

 

After he read the message, Makoto’s heart froze for a second before coming back to life at full speed. _They are finally coming back._ Relief flooded through his veins and Makoto let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. It felt like he was breathing for the first time in ages.

Haru was coming back.

 _Not for me_ , Makoto forced himself to think straight. Haru was returning because of the competition, because of school, because of his life. _Not because of me._

No matter how many times he whispered the words to himself, however, the unwelcome thoughts slid into the back of his mind and wouldn’t go away. Using just the light coming from his cellphone to type a quick reply, Makoto soon found himself entangled in the sheets once again, thinking of nothing but Haru. 

_Hi Rin! What is the time and the number of your flight? I might go pick you guys up after all..._

**  
**  
To be continued. **  
**

**Author's Note:**

> This was a collaborative, role-play, and fanfic work between Nath_happiness and I. She wrote Haru and I wrote Mako. The ending was written by us both. 
> 
> The Arabian scene is a dream Makoto had following his fight with Haru. So when Makoto wakes up, it's just before the competition and Rin and Haru are coming back from Australia. :) Inspired by the dream scenario from the Makoharu mook!
> 
> We appreciate any thoughts and feedback you might have! Tell us what you think! :D Working on this together was so much fun and we really hope you enjoyed reading it as much as we did writing it. 
> 
> Edit: There will be a sequel! :)


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